Hello, Zuko Here
by Golden Solidus
Summary: Zuko's thoughts as he faces the Gaang for the first time as an ally. Includes reflections on what happened Ba Sing Se, Azula, Mai, etc. Somewhat anti Maiko. Reviews always appreciated.


You'd think that after years at sea, then being on the run from an entire nation, and furthermore standing up to my own father at last, that I would be able to face anything. That no matter where I could possibly go, I would be able to get along just fine. Yet here and now, facing this group of teenagers all of them my junior from various parts of the world, I have never felt less prepared in my life. My eyes sweep right to left. There he is, in all his glory. The Avatar. The last time I saw him, his fatally wounded body was in the arms of the Water Tribe girl as they made their escape with Uncle's help after Azula shot him with lightening. I spent over three years searching for and hunting him, and now I'm begging him to let me teach him the art of firebending.

The Avatar stands tall in a mix of Fire Nation and his traditional Air Nomad garb, staff stuck into the ground prominently, eyes narrowed with suspicion and anger that I regret to say my past actions have caused to be there. To his right is the girl-what was her name-Kashara? Well, it doesn't seem to matter now. The way she looks at me makes my heart fall into my stomach and I start to sweat. Her glare immediately screams 'Azula!' to me, that cold, emotionless face of stone which, whenever dawned by my sister, meant misery for me as a child and danger as an alleged traitor. This girl cannot annihilate me in one instant with a deadly precise blast of blue flames. She does not have the cat-like grace or chilling omnipotence of a princess, or the smooth delicate voice laced with narcissistic undertones. But unlike Azula, this girl has feelings; love, grief, gratitude, frustration, passionate anger and a hatred of the Fire Nation perfectly justified by her mother's death at our hands.

She is actually quite a powerful bender now, and I remember that with each encounter I had with the Avatar back before I returned to the Fire Nation, the Waterbender girl always got stronger. When we were both imprisoned by Azula in Ba Sing Se, after we both confessed some things about ourselves, she offered to heal my scar in an act of complete selflessness. And then the Avatar and Uncle showed up. What happened to me that day is such a blur now. Azula got to me. I was so stupid, blinded by the delusion that with my father's love, my life would be whole. The next thing I knew I was fighting this girl, and she clearly must have felt betrayed. Azula took on the Avatar and damaged him immensely. Soon the Dai Lee arrived. It was the Avatar and the Waterbender against all of us. They had no hope. Or so I thought.

We cornered the Avatar while the Dai Li closed in on the Waterbender. I will always remember the look in the Avatar's eyes when he saw the situation he was in. He was worn and tired, and there was no way he could take us all or his friend could either. He glanced towards her with what I can only describe as sheer love and desperation. Then he enclosed himself inside a crystal structure he earthbended together. I made to move towards him, but Azula stopped me. "Wait". The entire crystal began to glow so brightly that it hurt to look at it. Suddenly it burst open, and the Avatar rose up valiantly, with a great radiation of power pulsing from him unlike anything of this earth. I stumbled backwards, not able to see or hear or breathe or think…until I heard the shrill pierce of sound that could only have one birthplace. Stone cold, I turned to face Azula. Her fingers were still smoking, and her eyes exuded chilling sadism and hellish finality. The Avatar's body began to fall to the ground, crumpled and corpse like with the kiss of death sealed upon it. And all of this happened within a split second before a wave of water completely engulfed me. The girl caught him as though he was a feather. Azula was about to strike again when Uncle suddenly appeared and held us off long enough to ensure the duo's escape.

Ever since that day I've been angry. I've felt more conflicted and confused and afraid than I have ever in my whole life. Yet now I feel no anger. Because I finally realize that I don't hate the Avatar; I hate my father. As a child, he made me feel as though I were nothing and took my mother away from me. When I was 13, he assaulted me before my own people and exiled me to go and accomplish an impossible feat with no reasonable grounds in the least for doing so. When I returned home, Azula's lie bought me his love, but that was just it. It was all a lie. The real me isn't a prince lording over his servants and riding around like I am superior to everyone else. The real me is the boy I was under my mother's tutelage, the compassionate, humble, and persistent young man who vanished along with my mother. Within half a decade of my mother's absence, I morphed into a carbon copy of my father. I was strong (visibly anyway), merciless, and hardened, just like any prince should be. But the transformation was never completed due to the presence of my uncle, and when my truth unleashed itself at that fateful war meeting, I paid the price. Three years later, I've finally reverted back to that young boy who played with his knife, but with one major difference. I will no longer stand subservient to the whims of the twisted mind of Ozai. I will aid the Avatar however I can, we will defeat the crown of flames, and then I shall go seek out my Uncle and my mother, Ursa. The right path is at last the one my feet are striding upon.

And yet, one part of my old life still haunts me. Mai. I feel guilty for leaving her without any warning, any sign, but I'm confused as to how I feel about her now. Mai represents everything I held close as a façade, all of the circumstances which trapped my soul in turmoil as my true nature screamed its demands and fell upon deaf ears. She never knew anything about new me; how I lived on the run for many months and learned humility the hard way, and why I fought against Azula side by side with youth from three other nations. Even that delicate Earth Kingdom girl, Jin, knows a little more about who I really am than Mai.

And Azula herself? It boggles my mind that mere months ago she was out to kill or imprison me and yet just yesterday back home we slept down the hall from each other and spent a good deal of time together without any conflict at all. I have gained a profound understanding of what my sister really is. She is a carbon copy of my father, yet even more vicious. All her life she was told that she was the favorite child, the prodigy, the clever one, and she evolved in that role. She never knew anything different. Even when she traveled about the Earth Kingdom searching for the young Avatar, Uncle, and I, she always had either the royal fleet or Ty Lee and Mai at her feet. She has never been alone like I have. That is why she feels no remorse for the atrocity she committed against the Air Nomad. He is not a person to her, but an obstacle which must be swiftly dealt with. My eyes were opened when I was alone. Isolated from everything I knew and all who knew my past, I could broaden my perspective and learn the truth about the state of the world, and the other people in it. In a way, I pity Azula. True power comes from breaking outside the bubble our own culture and ancestry create for us, something she will never experience. She does not know her loss now, but when I return to the Fire Nation and finally face her as the man I know I am becoming, I will ensure that Azula feels weak and vulnerable, and accepts the whirlwind of falsehoods her life has yielded which will lead to her ultimate destruction.

I must turn my attention back to the group. The tall youth standing powerfully with sword clasped has come a long way from the pathetic little warrior I brushed aside at the South Pole. He too looks suspicious of my intents, but the fire which dwells in his sister's eyes is noticeably absent. Great intelligence and leadership skills seem to emanate from him, and at least I can predict that this boy is rational enough to understand the benefits of trusting me outweigh the risks. And directly to his left is the last of the Avatar's gang; the blind earthbender with the power to manipulate metal. My Uncle described her to me once, as the two apparently met and had tea during the period when I so foolishly distanced myself from him. Again, she might be the voice of rationality that will convince the others to give me a chance. I must lay the foundation, however.

I take a deep breath and begin to speak. Time will only tell my fate as I await my verdict at the hands of the young Avatar, the boy I am destined to assist in saving the world.


End file.
